Epidemic Cases Of CRS Amongst Filipinos

One very frustrating thing that boggles my mind, is that native filipinos seem to be born with CRS (Can’t Remember Shit)

I swear to the non-existent god, texting with them is like deja vu. Check this text conversation:

9:23am HIM: What time I should meet you for interview, and where?

9:24am ME:  Please meet me at Starbucks at 2pm

9:24am Him: Ok ok

1:55pm ME: I am here at Starbucks waiting 4 u

1:57pm HIM: Ok I take shower and go there now

1:58pm ME: What??? I said meet at 2pm at Starbucks! You haven’t even left your place yet?

1:59pm HIM: It’s 2pm now, I am going to meet you now!

2:00pm ME: Don’t bother to come, you’re fired before you’re even hired.

It is a common practice when you say “Meet at Starbucks at 2pm” they think that means to prepare to go at 2pm. How stupid can one be???? What is so hard to understand about Meet AT STARBUCKS at 2pm??? That means you are MEETING at 2pm!!! If you’re at home at 2pm, you’re not MEETING at 2pm. Idiots.

Then another thing is, they will agree to be somewhere tomorrow at a certain time, then when they don’t show up, they say “I’m sorry, I have class, I can’t go” BUT YOU KNEW YOU HAD CLASS WHEN YOU AGREED TO BE SOMEWHERE ELSE, SO WHY DID YOU AGREE TO BE SOMEWHERE WHEN YOU KNEW YOU COULDN’T BE THERE BECAUSE OF CLASS?????????? IDIOTS!!!!

So You Want To Own A Business Huh?

Source: http://www.subicrocks.com/news/?p=51

So You Want To Own A Business Huh?
Jobs here are done ever so slowly, as the thinking of the workmen is, if we finish the job, there will be no more work to do. In any other country, of course they know if they fiinsh quickly, they can move onto the next job and their reputation for doing the work fast will help get them more work. Let’s examine this further:

On a daily basis, many comments are uttered, sometimes in a constructive manner, sometimes just as a complaint or expression of frustration directed at foreign business owners and managers, as to job performance or customer service. I wanted to shed some light on the “WHY” of “why can’t this place be run professionally”.

You may come to the Philippines from ANY backround in ANY business, military, entertainment, human resources, whatever. You have NEVER run into what you will experience here.

Believe me or don’t, as a business owner or manager you are dealing with a whole new dynamic, and whole new set of rules in dealing with people, that you cannot fathom. At first you go into denial, then shock, and usually fall into apathy when trying to accomplish the simplest compliance to RULES and REGULATIONS with Filipinos.

I’m generalizing here and there are exceptions to this. And I generally LIKE Filipinos and hold no ill will against them.

You, coming from any western society, have some basic tenants. After getting the job, you show up on time. You work while you’re on the job. You learn as much as you can about every aspect of the job so that you can handle anything that comes up. You make suggestions to make the workplace, product, delivery, and customer service aspects BETTER, etc, etc…You strive to make your customers happy so that they wil return again and again, and you do all of the above in an honest and pleasant manner, and take pride in doing so…

Ok, now THROW ALL OF THAT OUT THE WINDOW.

Imagine living and working in a society where they have not learned these things, and do not necessarily agree with them, or even understand why you would want to act in that way, and in fact, it’s DISCOURAGED!!!!!! You know that little talk your parents gave you when you were about 9 years old, about growning up and acting like an adult? THAT NEVER HAPPENS HERE.

The Filipino work dynamic goes more like this:

1. Having a job is the goal….not actually performing any tasks.
2. ANYTIME, is PLAYTIME.
3. It is perfectly acceptable to lie, cheat, steal, bare false witness, even sabotage the workers, and the workplace if you feel in ANY WAY, you have been insulted or asked to DO SOMETHING beyond or different then what you (or others before you) have been told in the past, or if being told makes you lose face, in the slightest way.
4. If you DO a good job, you will be told you are boastful, or a showoff, and you will be alienated from the rest of the employees, and attempts will be made to get rid of you.
5. ANY CHANGE is immediately rejected and complained about.
6. Getting the salary is the MOST important aspect of having a job, with no thought to earning it, or deserving it.
7. Show up late, if at all, then take a meal, take as many breaks as you can get away with, and sit on your ass as often as you are not being directly supervised, then leave work early.
8. Do not find out about, or learn anything else about your environment, so you will have fewer responsibilities.
9. When asked ANYTHING, say YES, or OK so you will stop being asked, with zero intention of carrying out the thing asked of you, or knowledge of what was being asked.
10. There are no consequences for doing things that would normally get you fired in western society, so do whatever you want to.
11. The BIGGEST CRIME you can commit as an employee is RAT OUT ANOTHER FILIPINO for doing something wrong.
12. Yelling ANYTHING across a room is the norm.
13. Interrupting is normal and the next person to say ANYTHING misdirects the conversation or task. If called to task for interrupting, saying “excuse me” FOR THE PURPOSE OF INTERRUPTING will now be standard.
14. At any point from A to B during a task, the task may be interruped or even forgotten about if ANYTHING occurs in the environment, such as, a friend talking, a loud noise, a sudden movement, or anything else deemed more FUN occurs etc…
15. Tagalog ALWAYS takes presidence over ANY other language especially if there is an ongoing conversation.
16. Cutting in line, or bumping others to get to where you are going is normal.
17. The foreigner owner or manager is “RICH” so this justifies any theft or income related problems.
18. It’s all up to “GOD’S PLAN” anyway, so there is nothing one can do to change anything and ZERO precautions should be taken
19. If it rains on Monday, Tuesday many persons will be absent because of the changing weather.
20. Reasons to be late or absent for work: too much traffic, rain or puddles of water, washing clothes, it was dark, no transportaion available, no electricity, no money, dead, sick or hungry baby or relative or next door neighbor or the slightest fever, headache, runny nose, or bad mood, had to travel somewhere to give money to family, or friend.
21. Superstitions are TRUE and the REAL reason for bad performance or low income is due to whatever superstition was not observed.
22. The environment MUST be noisy.
23. If told to do the duties of the job too many times, a mutiny, coup, or strike is necessary.
24. If Friday is a Holiday, then expect things to start falling apart on Wednesday, as workers get ready for the Holiday. BTW, they won’t ALL return to work until sometime around Tuesday.
25. If your business closes at 9pm, then wrapping up work and getting ready to go home begins at 8pm-8:30pm. This includes putting the cash in the safe, so no change is available, all the way to locking the doors, or pulling down the security shutters. AT 9pm the building will be absent of employees
26. If you try to fire someone from their job, they must be given verbal warnings, written warnings, and suspensions, and all have a certain number of issuances that comply with the Dept Of Labor, or the person can sue for damages.
27. Staff is to work no longer than 90 days or 6 months on the job (depending on the job) so that they are not eligible for benefits. This explains why it’s no one knows what they are doing, since they are new.
28. Anything considered childish in Western society, is cute and fun and desired in local society.
29. Anything not chained down or padlocked is free for the taking.
30. Any new manager or owner that asks anything of any employee is now the target of gossip and rumor. Usually along the lines of, the new manager/owner is not nice, and I wish the old one would come back.
31. If employees are EVER rewarded by management, it will now be EXPECTED and comments will fly about as to management being cheap if the same reward is not repeated. No thanks will be given for the reward.
32. If something gets broken or is stolen, there will be NO witnesses. If broken in the vicinity of a customer, the FIRST thing that happens, is a long pause in activity to determine who is NOT at fault so as to avoid blame and re-payment.
33. If a regular customer orders the same item/drink/food, time after time, no matter what he orders on his next visit, he will get what he ordered last time.
34. When spoken to by management, staff really hear something similar to the Peanuts TV series when adults are talking. Imagine a muted trumpet/trombone wa-wa sound….”Ok, here is what I want you to do. Wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa. Ok?” “Yes sir.”
35. Every comment/request to get compliance will be answered with a justification or excuse.
36. An argument with staff, will escalate to “Go Back To Your Country”, or “I will report you to Immigration/NBI/Police” within seconds to get you to back off.
37. If items A/B/C are sold in the store. And those items are the main thrust of the business’ sales, unless acted upon by a manager or owner, those items will not be re-ordered, or “in-stock” and no one will notice or comment on the fact that there is an upcoming shortage of those items.
Hope I haven’t left anything out, and the longer you live/work/shop here, the longer your list…

Note: To retain one’s sanity, you are only allowed to ask ONE “why” question per day…

Philippines Fail Blog Follower Thanks Filipinos For Their Stupidity

Hi Filofail, I am a Filipina whom left the Philippines when I was 5 years old. I grew up in California and spent 35 years there before moving back to the Philippines to take care of our family’s land.

My husband and I decided we would move to the Philippines because of the numerous business opportunities. We have many successful businesses here but it was and still is very frustrating employing local Filipinos. To deal with and understand our workers as well as Filipinos in general , we started doing lots of research and purchased various books to help us understand why it is the way it is here in the Philippines.

Recommended books:

1. A Management Approach “Understanding Filipino Values” by Tomas D. Andres

2. “Philippines Damaged Culture” by Poch Suzara

These books truly helped me understand why Filipinos are so stupid and why the country is the way it is. You can grab these very inexpensive books from National or Fully Booked. I recommend everyone to read these books before migrating to the Philippines.

I thank all the stupid Filipinos in the Philippines, because if it weren’t for your stupidity we wouldn’t be as successful as we are today. Due to the stupidity level in the Philippines we “Westernized Filipinos” have the upper hand when it comes to business.

More About Globe And Their NON-Service

Globe Telecom, Inc., one of the Philippines’ top telecommunications companies, has pioneered services in different ways, including delivery of the newest technologies.

Its innovative G-Cash SMS-based service enables money transfers and purchases and payments via mobile phones. It has made Internet connection possible on handheld devices, first through GPRS, and later through Mobile Broadband 3G for high-speed internet browsing and multimedia streaming.

Globe Telecom’s commitment to the customer serves an end-all: enhancing people’s lives. From Ayala Corporation Website

EQualizer Post:

I have read your previous posts about consumer harassment by unscrupulous debt collection agencies.

For a change, here’s a  different story about how consumers are treated by telecom companies. Unbelievably, this is from GLOBE TELECOM, a joint venture between Ayala and Singtel, two of the most respected companies in the ASEAN region.

January 3

1) My call to Globe Customer Service (211):

Computer voice:

Good afternoon welcome to Talk To Globe hotline:

Press 1 for English Instructions

Press 2: For Rewards, Billing, Roaming or Account Related Assistance

Press 1: For Mobile, Mobile Browsing or Tattoo

Press:2 For Postpaid

Press O:To Talk To A Customer Assistance Representative

Sorry All our Agents  are busy.You can use our live chat at www.globe.com

Should you want to wait to talk to our representative,press 0

Sorry all our representatives are busy now.

2) I decided to try the Globe live chat at www.globe

Welcome to the new, improved Globe website Please bear with us as we are still doing some tweaks and chasing a few bugs here and there. If you find any errors, We would love for you to let us know, simply flag them using our little red Flag This buttons that you can find on each page. Thanks for your patience and for choosing Globe.

Need Assistance?

Sorry, our Globe chat assistance representatives are busy now , email us or try our direct line at Globe 211

3) So I decided to send an email to Globe:

Name:wrote my full name Telephone Number:0917——–

home address:wrote my full home address birthdate:wrote my birthdate(account verification) Mother’s maiden name:wrote my mother’s maiden name (for account verification)

Request:Change of Plan:Fully loaded P299 plan effective January 15.My current plan ends on January 14. Pls confirm the implementation of my request

Email Reply of Globe

From: Globe Telecom Chat Assist Service <gtcas@globetel.com.ph> To: My gmail account Sent: Monday Subject: Chat Assist Auto Reply

Hi there! Don’t forget to send us the following details so we can assist you with your concern as soon as possible:

Account Holder’s complete name

Globe mobile

Globe landline

Your concern as detailed as possible

You can learn more about Globe’s product and services by logging-on  to www.globe.com.ph

Thank you! 4) Considering the futility of the live chat and email complaints, I decided to call Globe 211 again:

Computer voice:

Good afternoon welcome to Talk To Globe hotline:

Press 1 for English Instructions

Press 2: For Rewards, Billing, Roaming or Account Related Assistance

Press 1: For Mobile, Mobile Browsing or Tattoo

Press:2 For Postpaid

Press O:To Talk To A Customer Assistance Representative

Sorry All our Agents are busy.You can use our live chat at www.globe.com

Should you want to wait to talk to our representative,press 0

Sorry all our representatives are busy now.

I waited for 15 minutes and listened patiently to the Globe jingle music.

Finally a live voice:

My name is…. How can I help you?

Me:My two-year locked-in plan with Globe ends on January 14,I like to change it to a P 299 plan.

Assistant: Can I know some personal details first.

What’s your home address?

Me: I live in……..

What’s your birth date?

Me: June……..

What your mother’s maiden name ?

Me: Juanita B……

What’s your middle initial ?:

Me:Didn’t I just give you my mother’s maiden name???

Ah,Ok.Sorry,I can’t verify your contract date now.System problem.Please call again. 5) I called again after two hours ,hoping that the Globe data base system was already ok

Computer voice:

Good afternoon welcome to Talk To Globe hotline:

Press 1 for English Instructions

Press 2: For Rewards, Billing, Roaming or Account Related Assistance

Press 1: For Mobile, Mobile Browsing or Tattoo

Press:2 For Postpaid

Press O:To Talk To A Customer Assistance Representative

Sorry All our Agents are busy.You can use our live chat at www.globe.com

Should you want to wait to talk to our representative,press 0

Sorry all our representatives are busy now.

I waited again for 20 minutes and listened patiently to the Globe jingle music.

Finally a live voice:

My name is…. How can I help you?

Me:My two-year locked-in plan with Globe ends on January 14, I like to change it to a P 299 plan.

Assistant:Sorry, please call 5 days before the contract ends. Me:Ok I will call on January 10.Thank you

6) I called Globe on January 10, 5 days before the expiration of my current locked-in contract,per the suggestion of the customer service representative:

Computer voice:

Good afternoon welcome to Talk To Globe hotline:

Press 1 for English Instructions

Press 2: For Rewards, Billing, Roaming or Account Related Assistance

Press 1: For Mobile, Mobile Browsing or Tattoo

Press:2 For Postpaid

Press O:To Talk To A Customer Assistance Representative

Sorry All our Agents are busy.You can use our live chat at www.globe.com

Should you want to wait to talk to our representative,press 0

Sorry all our representatives are busy now.

I waited for 20 minutes and listened patiently to the Globe jingle music.

Finally a live voice:

My name is…. How can I help you?

Me:My two-year locked-in plan with Globe ends on January 14,I like to change it to a P 299 plan.

Assistant: Can I know some personal details first.

What’s your home address?

Me: I live in……..

What’s your birth date?

Me: June……..

What your mother’s maiden name ?

Me: Juanita B……

What is your requested change of plan?

Me: Fully loaded P299 plan.

What freebies? Options A, B or C?

Me: What are those options?

She explained in detail the three freebies options.

Me:Plan A, extra SMS.

Sir,you need to call on the day itself, January 14.

Me:I was told to call 5 days before! Anyway, I will call on January 14.Thanks.

7) I called on January 14:

Computer voice:

Good afternoon welcome to Talk To Globe hotline:

Press 1 for English Instructions

Press 2: For Rewards, Billing, Roaming or Account Related Assistance

Press 1: For Mobile, Mobile Browsing or Tattoo

Press:2 For Postpaid

Press O:To Talk To A Customer Assistance Representative

Sorry All our Agents are busy.You can use our live chat at www.globe.com

Should you want to wait to talk to our representative,press 0

Sorry all our representatives are busy now.

I waited for 15 minutes and listened patiently to the Globe jingle music.

Finally a live voice:

My name is…. How can I help you?

Me:My two-year locked-in plan with Globe ends on January 14, I like to change it to a P 299 plan.

Assistant: Can I know some personal details first.

What’s your home address?

Me: I live in……..

What’s your birth date?

Me: June……..

What your mother’s maiden name ?

Me: Juanita B……

What is your requested change of plan?

Me: Fully loaded P299 plan.

What freebies? Options A,B or C?

Me: What are those options?

She explained in detail the three freebies options.

Me:Plan A, extra SMS.

Sir,please wait while i check your contract.

After 5 minutes,the lovely voice said:

“Sir,I just checked your contract, it ends on January 15, not January 14.”

Me: Whatever.Just change the plan on January 15 then.

The lovely voice said:Sir, it’s done.This is the confirmation number:FLP11010001856.”

I asked, “what’s your name?”

“Nicole” sir. Pls call tomorrow to confirm implementation.

Me:Why should I call again?

Nicole: to confirm.

Me:Whatever.

8) I got a text message from Globe on the evening of January 14:

Sir, this is — from Globe .The requested change of plan cannot be implemented on January 15 . Per our records, the contract expires on January 16. 9) I reported this crazy mix-up to a Globe manager. 10) I then got a Globe text: Per instruction of Mr ._______ ,we will implement the change of plan on January 15 . 11) On January 15, I got another GLOBE text: “We will charge you on a pro-rated basis for advancing the date of the change of plan from January 16 to January 15.”

Globe Telecom: Like Children Playing Company

Ok, so as usual, got shitty service with my Globe internet connection. (It’s usual to have shitty service pretty much with anything in Philippines).

But anyway, I’ve been dealing with the dynamic IP address connection, and about half the time, I have selective browsing issues (that’s where you can’t access some websites from a particular IP address). So, being that this one website I can’t access from my Globe service is a site I need to access for me to do my job (I work from home), I’ve been dealing with Globe idiots for quite some time. And as usual with filipino idiocy, I have to fight and scream, and beg to get what I am paying for. (Gosh, no wonder 95% of the world community does NOT want to have anything to do with Philippines, especially in business).

So anyway again, they send two dumbshits over to my house to check my connection and router. I prove to them that I cannot access certain sites. They go and recommend to their superiors that they give me a static IP address in order to fix the problem. Their superior calls me and says, “We have a solution, but in order to fix it, we’ll need to charge you an extra 700 pesos for the static IP address.”

Ok, so before I continue with this, I’m curious as hell to know if there’s a filipino out there who can tell me the UTTER AND COMPLETE STUPID FAILURE OF GLOBE IN THEIR CALL TO ME. Please, if you think you know, please comment.

 

APRIL 10 -

Ok, finally got 1 response on this 7 days later, a surprisingly intelligent comment, which goes to show there are a few filipinos out there (and I do mean A FEW – VERY SMALL AMOUNT) which have a measurable level of intelligence.

Anyway, what was wrong with Globe’s call to me, and their solution is this:

I am paying for full access to the internet for p2000/month. I am not getting full access, therefore, I am not getting what I am paying for. I am getting selective browsing, meaning I cannot access certain sites from certain IP addresses they assign me. I don’t care what excuses they have, business is business. I do my part and pay p2000, and they need to do their part to see I get “full access”. They suggest to correct the problem would require a static IP address, fine. Do it, but I should not have to pay more for it. If giving me a static IP address will give me full access, then problem solved.

But most filipinos will not understand this concept. They are too fucking stupid. When you complain that you’re not getting what you’re paying for, you shouldn’t have to pay more to correct the problem dumbasses! It’s up to the company who is providing the service to do whatever it takes at their cost to make sure you are getting what you are paying for.

Such failed brains. Sus!

The i’s have it! – Irrational, Inconsiderate, Ignorance with all traffic

It blows my fucking mind how absolutely fucking idiotic filipinos are, especially in traffic.

I had just purchased a charcoal grill from the hardware store a short walk away from my home. But there is a major highway that I have to cross.

Fortunately, there’s a nice big pedestrian crosswalk right there where I need to cross.

Unfortunately the paint used to mark the crosswalk was completely wasted (as are any and all highway and road markings, as they go completely and utterly ignored in Philippines).

So it’s peak traffic time, and traffic is just moving a few feet at a time. I step into the crosswalk and not a single ignorant stupid dumbfuck filipino stops, and EVERYONE is honking at me IN THE CROSSWALK, AS IF I HAVE NO RIGHT TO BE THERE!!! OH MY GOD!! HOW GOD DAMN FUCKING RUDE, IGNORANT, AND STUPID CAN A NATION OF PEOPLE BE????

Then I get halfway across and decide to keep going, and a big truck blows it’s loud air horn at me. Well that did it for me. I set the grill down, climbed up on the driver’s side steps up to his window and told him, “You will look really fucking stupid with that horn shoved up your ass, because if you ever honk it at a pedestrian in a crosswalk again while I’m around, that’s where I’m gonna put that fucking horn you stupid ignorant shit-for-brains!”

BUT HERE’S THE MOST AMAZINGLY FUCKING STUPID THING ABOUT ALL THIS: They were honking at me, because I was stopping them for a brief moment from moving forward about 10 more feet to the bumper of the car in front of them in the traffic jam!! (as if I was making them late to be 10 feet from where they are now on the jammed up highway.

I gotta tell you, filipinos never cease to blow my mind with their irrational illogical, amazingly discourteous ways of moving in crowds (on foot and by motor vehicle). The traffic situation in Philippines is so bad, because there is NOT ONE SINGLE FILIPINO who has enough brains to drive cooperatively, logically, and with at least a measureable level of courtesy in order to help traffic flow smoother and faster.

Yep, you people are real fucking idiots. Just stand at any road or street corner and watch yourselves dumbfuck all over each other. It’s sad, funny, and just so stupid.